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Q. Is it inappropriate for flower girls in a wedding to wear white shoes in December?  And can grooms wear white shoes if their tuxes are white?
-White out

A. For flowers girls, pretty ballet flats or black or white patent leather Mary Janes are appropriate to wear for a wedding any time of the year.  Now comes my hesitancy about white tuxes on men in December. I am not a fan of an all white tux on men anytime and definitely not white shoes with white tuxes.

When it comes to standard wedding attire requirements for men:

Formal Evening: A formal evening wedding usually means black tie. The groom and groomsmen wear black tuxedos with white or ivory shirts and black ties, cummerbunds or vests. It s totally appropriate to add some color into this outfit if you wish. Another option is to go the James Bond 007 route and choose white or ivory dinner jackets for a formal evening wedding.

Ultraformal Evening: When you expect everyone to show up in gowns. This is when men go white tie and it s reserved for the most elaborate evening weddings. The groom and groomsmen wear black tailcoats with white waistcoats or vests, wing-collared shirts and white bow ties. They can also wear fancy studs and cufflinks and their shoes are usually black patent leather. White or light colored suits are usually reserved for summer months and are worn in lighter fabrics like cotton and linen.

If you must have your white tuxedos, then have the men wear black cummerbunds and ties so they can wear black dress shoes.

Untitled1-1Q. I am a bridesmaid in an upcoming beach wedding that the chosen colors are fuschia and turquoise.  I have to say, the bride picked out a hot little fuschia halter dress for the bridesmaid dresses.  But, my dilemma is the shoes and the jewelry.  First of all, what color shoes would you suggest?  I’m thinking more of a silver sandal or very low heel.  Second of all, they just sent the picture of the jewelry (see attached) and the turquoise large teardrop pendant and earrings are supposed to be for me.  Is it just me, or is this a hideous ensemble?

-Jewelry Uncertain

A. Not loving the jewelry choices, especially the “rough” cut combination. Without seeing the dress, it’s difficult to choose many options for you that may work for the dress. I am not a fan of wearing matching earrings and necklace. I think it’s boring and skips an opportunity to express your style and take a chance. I do not know how many bridesmaids are in the wedding party, but as I’ve said in past Ask Alison columns, I am not in favor of making the bridesmaids into paper cut-outs and dressing them the same from head to toe.  It can become costly to the bridesmaids to buy the dress, the jewelry, the shoes, etc. that are the choices of the bride.  Unless the bridesmaids are clueless about style, I believe in letting them make a few choices in their attire, whether it be shoes, jewelry or both. And, of course, with the help of digital cameras and computers, friends can send photos to the bride to let her know what they intend to pair with the dress to get final approval.

With that in mind, I would suggest keeping jewelry delicate for a beach wedding. A thin silver or gold necklace with a charm or small bead would be lovely - and then add earrings. As for your feet, keep to flat silver or gold sandals since you’ll be in the sand. If the reception moves indoors or to a real dance floor, you can bring along heels to slip into.

Neck 3 Lightgreen LEar Gold Blueballs LNeck 7N24 Big

some beachy suggestions:

1. Lisa Goodwin Wishful Linking Necklace Chalcedony/Optimism, $85 at
2. Lisa Stewart Hoop Earrings with Wrapped Turquoise, $180 at
3. Allison Daniel Large Starfish Necklace, $8 at

Hoops PearlNeck Wishbone L

4. Haley M Endless Pearl Hoops, $55 at
5. Zoe Chicco Silver Wishbone Necklace, $75 at

Q. What a fantastic site!  I’m attending a friend’s engagement party in late Oct.  It will be held in the afternoon at a country club.  I was planning to wear a shawl collared white shirt with a wrap tie (new at Ann Taylor), a black pencil skirt with some small pleats in the back and some awesome Stuart Weitzman peep toe pumps in a deep red/burgundy patent leather.  My sister tells me I would look like the staff and I shouldn’t wear the black and white.  Help?  I thought I could pull it off with killer shoes!  BLACK AND WHITE?

A. You can definitely pull it off with killer heels and add a multi strand or chunky stand out necklace or a big cuff to add to the punch of the outfit.

CC Skye Enamel Cuff BraceletMod hammered cuffResin pyramid bangle

Circle link necklaceFloral triple-strand necklace

1. CC Skye Enamel Cuff Bracelet, $202 at
2. Mod hammered cuff, $32 at
3. Resin pyramid bangle, $24 at
4. Circle link necklace, $38 at
5. Floral triple-strand necklace, $88 at

Q.  I’m attending a formal evening wedding this September in Southern California. I’ve found this black strapless dress (with tiny gold polka-dots on it, a black sash that ties on the side of the waist, and it falls just below my knees).  What do you think about a 3-strand necklace of chunky gold (not shiny) beads — it falls almost to the top of the dress. They make quite the statement, because of their size, but my friends seem to think they look fabulous!   Still, I’d like your input, especially with pairing the gold necklace with gold heels.  Speaking of which, what do you think about some great gold heels?  I am afraid of being too matchy-matchy with the gold, but I can’t imagine wearing black heels. Won’t that look like potential funeral attire?
-Dress Wear

A. I do say go for the gold regarding your heels, but be sure the gold multi strand necklace doesn’t make the outfit look too ’80s.  Put the complete outfit on and get a second opinion, since it is a formal affair you want to also make sure you look classy and sophisticated.  Confidence in your clothes makes up for at least 50% of your wardrobe successes, so if you love it then wear it!

Q. I am attending a close friend’s evening wedding in late October. I have chosen a deep turquoise strapless bubble hem dress for the event. I am, however, unsure how to style this for a cool fall evening. Should I wear tights and heels? What kind of cover-up should I wear?
-Wear With What

Love Quotes ScarvesA. For a wedding, many of us will brave the chilly temps to wear great heels and bare a little leg for evening. You will be inside 98% of the time so you can still wear your favorite peep toes or even a strappy if that’s what looks best with the dress.  For weddings, I advise skipping a wedge heel since they hamper a girl that likes to do a lot of dancing.

If you are concerned that your legs will have a permanent case of goose bumps, then wear sheer hosiery in a color that matches either your heels or the dress.  Although turquoise sheer hosiery may be too ”Versace-like” for the wedding crowd. As for the cover-up, you’ll need a jacket to cover you from car to ceremony and ceremony to reception. A trench, ¾ length light coat or even a cropped jacket will do. When indoors, if you get a little chill, look for a lightweight wrap like one from Love Quotes. It will keep your look feminine and pretty whereas a wool wrap in October may look heavy.

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